assalamualikum,
i know you dont get many posts like this from me, so here it is.....I AM HAPPY mashAllah,....and no i am not at my mums or have moved out I am still in the same place, but I am happy. Dont know how long this will last but who cares I AM gonna enjoy the moment. I thank Allah for bringing me out of my depression and for giving me goals to aim for, I have a lot that I want to do. I thank Allah for my husband and kids, my sisters,my parents, and of course all my friends in blog world. Just need to focus and remember that I am a human and my inlaws CANNOT control me on the same level I only have ALLAH to fear and not them. It is hard I do admit I do still get the panic attacks if I am out for longer than a couple of hours but I reassure myself in my head that I am not committing a crime nor am I doing anything wrong by wanting to get fresh air with my hub and kids. I love you all.
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
Sunday, April 18, 2010
Random post alert.
i was supposed to be posting more during the holidays, but it has not been the case. I particularly wanted to write something in my private blog, and I really wanted Jana, for you to read it, but as I Have time constraints inshallAllah I will try and do it in the near future.
what I might do is write down instances/conversations that take place between my inlaws. they are gonna be really random. I am gonna head back to them with a positive attitude, my main focus is gonna be myself, kids and hub, not in anyway an order of importance! so heres to me!!
what I might do is write down instances/conversations that take place between my inlaws. they are gonna be really random. I am gonna head back to them with a positive attitude, my main focus is gonna be myself, kids and hub, not in anyway an order of importance! so heres to me!!
Friday, April 09, 2010
back again
assalamualikum,
its been a long time sinyce my last post, i really hope that everyone is well,i would like to apologise to the friends who left me comments in my last post that i didnt get back to and those who emailed me , i truly am sorry. I know that a lot of my blogging friends have been dealing with dificult times ib their lives and i really hope that Allah gets them through these turbulent times. so whats happening with me, well everything is STILL the same, though my depression is better MashaAllah or should i say i am coping that bit better. though the fustration within me still turns me into a very ugly human being.
I dont know what it is with them, i just wish that they could see with their own eyes what it is that they do. why is my going to see my parents an issue still? their daughter comes and stays over every other week so why is it a crime for me to see my parents. How is it that the very people that bought me into this world no longer have a say of when they can see me? what gives them any right to tell me "you only saw them a while ago ...why go again?" a while being almost 3 months. DOUBLE STANDARDS!!!
Recently i planned to go abroad and as i was flying oversees after 20 odd years i politely said to my Fil how i would like to see my father before I go... He at first didnt respond then, very coldly said well it is custom for your dad to come and see you not the other way round.....since when has there been rules and relations to see your own father? YET may i add if I am at my mums and he is planning on going somewhere it is my duty to leave my stay and see him off!
Oh im ranting again, its just that I am feeling down I am sick of my living situation, sick and tired of it all, i can never do enough to plaese these people NEVER. anyways my mum is pretty ill at the moment please pray for her. I cant even use this blog as an outlet when i need to because they have a problem with me being at the laptop, another reason for my disappearance...yet it is fine that they sit and hog the t.v all bloody day and night, but laptop, no no no.
its been a long time sinyce my last post, i really hope that everyone is well,i would like to apologise to the friends who left me comments in my last post that i didnt get back to and those who emailed me , i truly am sorry. I know that a lot of my blogging friends have been dealing with dificult times ib their lives and i really hope that Allah gets them through these turbulent times. so whats happening with me, well everything is STILL the same, though my depression is better MashaAllah or should i say i am coping that bit better. though the fustration within me still turns me into a very ugly human being.
I dont know what it is with them, i just wish that they could see with their own eyes what it is that they do. why is my going to see my parents an issue still? their daughter comes and stays over every other week so why is it a crime for me to see my parents. How is it that the very people that bought me into this world no longer have a say of when they can see me? what gives them any right to tell me "you only saw them a while ago ...why go again?" a while being almost 3 months. DOUBLE STANDARDS!!!
Recently i planned to go abroad and as i was flying oversees after 20 odd years i politely said to my Fil how i would like to see my father before I go... He at first didnt respond then, very coldly said well it is custom for your dad to come and see you not the other way round.....since when has there been rules and relations to see your own father? YET may i add if I am at my mums and he is planning on going somewhere it is my duty to leave my stay and see him off!
Oh im ranting again, its just that I am feeling down I am sick of my living situation, sick and tired of it all, i can never do enough to plaese these people NEVER. anyways my mum is pretty ill at the moment please pray for her. I cant even use this blog as an outlet when i need to because they have a problem with me being at the laptop, another reason for my disappearance...yet it is fine that they sit and hog the t.v all bloody day and night, but laptop, no no no.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
