aarrrrgggghhhhhh

okay so this new thing of mine to match whatever bull i am given is still hardwork, though i am not sitting back and taking it all, it still doesnt make it any easier to digest.
after spending a few days at my mums i come back to this

fil: ( To my kids) so what did your grandma feed you...no doubt you will have eaten in english shops...

me: no not only did we eat in the english shops we slept there too, spent our entire time there

fil..looks at me confused, and then realises i am being sarcastic, yes no doubt you will have had outside food, probably lived on junk
me: of course we did not eat proper food at all just pure junk
fil: yeah you ate a load of junk that was a mixture of halaal and haraam..

at this point my blood started to boil..

me: yes of course...but i made sure that the majority was haraam food that we consumed and we ate a bit of halaal here and there

fil silent
i continued in english to my kids, " did you hear that grandad says that we are haraam people he says that we eat haraam"
my child is upset "but mummy we dont eat haraam food"
I know we dont baby but this is what your grandad is saying


WTH!!!! what is the need for this? he meakes me crazy really crazy and i hate him, he is actually insulting my parents by saying that they allow and are feeding us harraam food.
i was so mad about this that i called my fil something not very nice infront of my hub....mu hub said nothing. i apologised to my hub afterwards but i told him that these games that his father plays are affecting me mentally.

anyways the next day when i am given breakfast my fil is standing next to me, and i say to my kids in english ...according to your grandad we just eat haraam stuff so lets see what there is....i know this is terrible its given mixed messages to my kids but its all because of that idiot i was seething. i did take my kids aside and explained as best as i could what had happened between me and their grandad, i told them that it hurts me when people say that i eat haraam food, as Allah does not want us to....that i never eat haraam food, but their grandad is not being nice and saying things that he should not.

i haver lost any ounce of respect taht i had for him, and i am keeping out his way.

The war of words is on!!

Remember I wrote about how my fil is always questioning whether i make halaal food or not..well listen to this im in the kitchen...
fil "are you making something to eat?
Me "no"
fil "how come you have stopped making snacks now"

me thinking perfect opportunity...
me "well there is no point you are so suspicious of everything I make you question whether its halaal"
yes it felt good to say!! I am gonna make a point of throwing everything that he attacks me with at given opportunities in his face!!

His daughter came to stay the weekend and sent most of the time eating and eating, and then has the cheek to say oh theres nothing to eat here.before she left ( yes thats because you and your brats ate it all)..we made two extra curries for her even though there were 3 curries already the day she came ..and cooked more the second day..i made salad, she had soup with bread,crisps, chocolate bars,hot chocolate.and these are just snacks not even the meals ( breakfast, lunch and dinner).i cooked 4 pans of rice over two days and she says we had nothing!!!aarrrrgggghhhhh

its really bad with snow here and when she took her kids out in the snow her father said nothing....when i did it he brought it up 3 times, how could i make my kids walk in the snow...so i said in the nicest way possible remember when you r daughter did it , it was okay then nothing at all...he didnt reply.

yes its so petty but the war of words are on, i am going to engrave every comment he makes and make sure that i have it to hand to throw back at him...during another conversation...he must hate me.

Facebook!!!

im not so sure about facebook, i know some people are completely addicted and have a very unhealthy realtionship with it, people whio are on it all the time. Now i made an account with a name..any name not mine just to see if i could find any of my friends on there and yeah i found loads. anyways one friend from high school had her profile open for all to look through her photos and stuff, and as i was looking OMG i came across a photo of myself....i mean aaarrrrrggggghhhhhhhhhh it was a photo of when i was 16, now it is bad enough to find a photo of myself but what is worse is that i am in my school uniform, with no hijabb....aaarrrrgggghhhhhhh. the only thing is that it is not a clear photo. anyways that was last week this week i am just looking at another friends profile and there there i was again...what the hell....i didnt even know this photo existed!!! wow! okay so what was bad was that it was a clear photo very clear but what was good was that i had started wearing hijaab so erm i dont know i am not comfortable with it at all. i guess every other person has their profile pic on its just that i am not comfortable at all....anyway i am now thinking Allah knows how many other photos people have of me. I have a strict no photo policy at weddings but i guess i am not always aware of when the camera is on me!