so what a day its been so lovely....i woke up to receive endless kisses from my kids and hub!My hub had taken the day off and suggested we go out somewhere nice.... Mil and fil agreed and told him to make sure that he spoilt me rotten! My inlaws got a beautiful salwar kameez for me, they know what i like and it was beautiful. Having dropped one of the kids to school we spent the day togther, I had a facial done, ny hair done ( islamic shop of course) endless presents,shopping, eating and more getting spoilt. At the end of the evening my hub made a lovely dinner for the two of us and the inlaws had kindly opted to babysit the kids whilst we had some time alone, we were joined by them at the end of the evening and guess what they had a lovely fresh cream cake just for me!!........REALITY CHECK!!! shouldnt let me daydream like that so how did it really go....
Hub had a go at me for throwing out stuff which i presumed was rubbish and seemed extremley annoyed. He had spent the previous day running around his family and came home with headcahe. i went upstairs to put kids to sleep ans started watching the drama "my family" little one was being a menace. hub came up and i left him with kids went down stairs and as i entered the kitchen i smelt freshly cooked rice...oh shit! i had forgotten to put the rice on, you see it is my duty to make sure tha the rice pan is a bottomless pit to everyone else. you could cut the tension with a knife. i say to my mil..oh you cooked rice, she looked at me with killer look and said ...was there any more rice to eat????? i explained that the lil one wouldnt sleep and left the room...i was so upset, I forget to put the rice on once and i am made to feel so guilty. i could feel my eyes starting to water.
i contemplated not eating i felt that i wasnt entitled to that rice, but hunger was getting the better of me so i went on the internet for a while, then headed back to the kitchen 10 mins later tidy up....and then can you believe she very calmy told me to eat, wow! she must have thought over how she had reacted. My hub did want to take me out but due to time constraints and inlaw questioning, he did however buy me some lovely gifts. so not all was bad!
14 comments:
happy birfday. Alhamdulillah it wasn't as bad as I expected.
I totally believed your story...i was like wow they were so nice to you!
Too bad it didn't go like that.
But you know what? I can totally relate to you on the cooking rice thing. Well, kind of. I've been wanting to write about this because i want to vent, but anyway...If i don't clean the house by a certain time, or if i'm doing the dishes at a time later then as-soon-as-i-wake-up i get the evil eye. I try to clean everything before the In laws come home from work. Since i really don't have a job, and because i don't drive, everyone acts like i'm useless. For real. So cleaning is the one way i can 'redeem' myself. So if i'm a second late doing this, the tension in the air is thick as hell.
argh.
anyway, happy birthday! you didn't say what gifts you were given!
happy birthday love....astaghfirullah for my thoughts against them.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!! I totally fell for your story too and I was beaming, so happy they were finally treating you well. I don't understand the rice thing and I don't get why they are so selfish. Does this make you angry with your husband? Do you sometimes feel like he should make them treat you better? I know, my husband doesn't let his family even LOOK my way wrong. And they respect me because they love him. Anyway, what presents were you given? Want me to DHL u a fresh cream cake? with big yellow sunflowers on top?
Salaamz sis
omg u reallly had me there
HAPPY HAPPY BDAI SIS you deserved
a better day but i guess all we can see is Alhamdulillah... wish i was there i think i would of kidnapped u for a day and spoilt you =p mwahh sis masha'allah ur strength is amazing and ur a wonderful woman to look up2.. mwa l0ovez y0ou x0
One should never throw out other people's stuff without asking first.And why did you leave the children's room as soon as your husband got there?That's what I like to know.Husbands need to be respected at all times.Your MIL has not an ounce of respect for you because your husband doesn't.He should not let her treat you in the manner like you have described on your blog,she has caused you to loose your dignity.Showing courtesy to people goes far.
Happy Birthday!May your husband treat you better tomorrow after you treat him like a friend,you could start with stealing kisses,first on his cheek then plant one straigh on his mouth in a cheeky short of a way,and let him know they are coming from your heart not a wifely duty.Also,whip him up a cream cake with perservered fruits and bake the sponge cake from scratch so he'll never forget the fresh,sweet good taste.
@tuttie: thanks
albaster:isnt it horrible when you you have to do soemthing by a certain time in a place that is supposed to be your home???? that feeling of uneasiness! humans should not make others feel like that no one is any better or any worse than the next person!
you are too young to endure that kind of behaviour, plaese do a course or soemthing to give yo me time....lol look at me giving you advice, i should advise my self some time!
i got clothes and perfume!
Jana: hi hun and thank you!
Anchor girl: the rice thing is my job, it should be ready...basically she went to eat and found that there was just enough for my fil...and angrily cooked it herself.. i should have cooked it...it is a very south east asian thing!
this is the reason why i am bitter towards my hub, and mashallah on the way that you are treated by your hub, I am a little envious...lol...mashallah may it always be like taht for yoyu ameen.cake sounds good!
@skye thank you hun, where are you these days missing you!i would have loved to spend a day with you i bet that would be wicked!
@kristalkitty...you are right somethinh should not be presumed as rubbish but this was totally rubbish, it was those plastic shitty hangers that come with clothes. we have a whole wardrobe full of proper hangers! he had left two in a plastic carrier bag in the spare room dumped on the floor.
i left the kids with my hub as he came cuz that is the routinue, i take them up and get them ready for bed, then he gets some time to himself, then when he comes up that is my call to come down to finish the tidying up. how am i not respecting my hub? i think that was a bit harsh...
his mother has had a tight grip on her sons like forever, no inlaws respect any bangladeshi dils well the ones i know.when he married me he made a promise to look after me, but unfortunately the mils power is above everyone elses...what his mum and dad says go, eben though it maybe detrimental to our realationship...i dont know why but your comment upset me, im sure you didnt mean to but i am over sensitive at the moment just so much my head can take right now.
It seemed to me that you left the room as soon as your husband entered and it was because you can't stand being around him.I've watched a woman constantly do this with her husband, but she has the Jezebel spirit without being aware of it.But if it was only because you live in tight quaters that's different I concur.
The reason you get your feelings hurt so esily is becuse you are looking to men to get your worth and value from not God.Men will always let us down one time or another,but not God.And He will get us out of any bind we are in.I pray that God will make the crooked way straight between all in your houshold.May you become a tough cookie with a soft center as you go through the hard knocks of life,so that every family member will respect you.
I say that your husband does not respect you,because your MIL can treat you anyway she wants and your husband does nothing about it.You children will treat you the same way,then watch out.
The husband was abusing his authority when you threw out that rubbish,he was vebally attacking you when he scolded you,pay attenteion to his tone of voice and the words he uses,that expresses what he feels in his heart of heart's for you.If he does not just admonish you but all but kicks you in the back,he is indeed abusing you.
The truth hurts,but we need to wke up to reality of wht is truly tking place in our lives then we will have freedom.Have a good day!
heyy ur back! I've been busy with work and haven't been coming online much these days. A lot of catching up to do! :)
Anyway good to have u back queen!
Hope you had a really good birthday sis:)
QUEEEEEEEEEN
i was getting so happy at the begining lol
but alhamdulilah
HAPPY BIRTHDAY HABIBTII
xxx <3
btw plz invite me to the private blog
nur.aqilah92@gmail.com
mwah xx
maz
i meant naz* :D
Oh man..I totally believed the first version and I was like..awww how sweet!
And then it all went downhill from there :(
Sorry you had such a bad birthday. Hang in there!
hmm...Queen....it seems besides change in our countries...nothing change...lol
Same MIL stories....thanks for sharing.
BTW...Happy Birthday !
I hope you will not mind my sneaking into your blog?
as-salaam aleikum,
ohhh I just read those questions you answered where you were talking about being a slave n wanting to get out of this hell hole...
so then when I read about your fake b-day story I was wondering if I read something wrong.... then it turned out to be a dream b-day for you.
I am sorry you have this family-life problem. I live with my MIL (my FIL passed away a long time ago) and Alhamdulillah she is a wonderful person but our heads to butt from time to time. But the difference is I can speak my mind to my MIL and we still get along even if we disagree on things.
Inshallah you can soon get into a better situation... either your own home or a bigger home...
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